A Full Plate

This last week was overwhelming in so many ways.

1. Classes began at Chico State. I knew that the classes were going to be impacted because so many classes had been cancelled and the number of emails requesting to add my classes were more than I've ever received in the past. But nothing prepared me for the onslaught. I had waiting lists for every one of my classes. One waiting list was 12 people long. Students were showing up at my office hours (which never happens the first week) to request to add. A line formed down the hall. Each student had their own special sob story which was accompanied with various version of doe or puppy dog eyes. It was heart wrenching.
2. Because of the press from students to add classes, along with the usual anonymous dropping of classes, my head was in a constant state of confusion. How many students were in each class and how many openings were available kept changing hour by hour, which made giving students any kind of concrete answer virtually impossible. By Thursday I was no less clear on the status of my class rosters than I was on Monday.
3. In addition to dealing with the stressors at work, Chelsea was scheduled to take her driving test on Thursday. This event took on far more personal import than I ever could have imagined. It was so not about whether or not she would pass. It was about my child taking one more step toward independence and away from me. I had difficulty sleeping. I didn't know if I wanted her to pass or to fail. Of course, this was a purely selfish dilema. I did want her to pass, to experience the joy of success, but the selfish side of me wanted to hold her closer and failing would ensure that she would be tied to me just a little while longer. I wished that anyone but me would take her for her test. I feared that my nerves would some how affect her and get in the way of her doing well. But, she insisted that I be the one to take her, so I bucked up and did.
4. She passed. I knew before she came back into the DMV. She chose to park the car after her test right in front of the window that I was sitting by. I looked out, saw her look nervously and expectantly at the driving evaluator, and then I saw it...she threw both of her hands up, smiled bigger than I've ever seen, and let lose with a scream of joy (I couldn't hear it but I could see it). She came bounding, yes bounding into the DMV, stumbled over a poor woman who was between us and gave me the biggest hug and told me the news. I was so proud of her. I'm so glad that I didn't miss that moment.
5. Amid the stress at work, I received an email from the person who headed my dissertation committee. He edited the first Encylopedia of Creativity and apparently he is editing the 2nd edition now. He requested that I write the chapter on Creativity and Therapy. I had to read the email several times to make sure I was reading what I thought I was reading. Out of all the creativity researchers out there he wanted me to write the chapter? Wasn't there anyone else out there with a little more gravitas to ask? So, I emailed him and thanked him for the opportunity and accepted. In his return email he told me that he and Art Bohart, a man who I respect greatly in the field of counseling techniques (he was also on my dissertation committee) were planning on co-authoring a book on Creativity and Therapy and they wanted me to write a chapter for that as well. I was thrilled and honored. Now that I've accepted I have to dust off my dissertation and get to writing.
6. I was supposed to attend the March in Sacramento on Friday, however by the time the end of the week approached I felt so wrung out that the thought of being on a bus for most of the day, standing in the hot sun, and interacting with others was too much. Priorities have to be set. I had loads of work to do, plus class rosters to sort out, and kids who had things that needed attending to, so I chose not to go. I'm so glad I did. I was able to sort everything out and after school was able to take Chelsea to buy her first wallet (now that she has a license she's got to have a place to keep it) and went to the bank and opened up a checking and savings account. I thought it was important for her to start learning how to manage money now rather than waiting until she heads off to college. Yet another step toward independence. I've got to say that she really is rising to the occasion and I'm extremely proud of her.

While it was a full and stressful week, I find myself reflecting back with much gratitude. Every challenge had its object lesson. I learned a lot about myself this week. I found strength that I didn't know that I had. I was humbled beyond words. I was honored by visits from past students who wished to stay in contact. I have a great job that affords me the opportunity to interact and sometimes impact others. I have great children who have goals and who do not shrink away from obstacles and challenges that may get in their way as they move toward achieving their goals. They make me happy and proud.